Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Of Thanksgiving, Turkeys, and Fresh Foam

Thanksgiving!
For some, the mere name conjures food porn of the highest order: turkey, duck, chicken (sometimes in the same overall package), ham, mashed potatoes, yams, and more pie than you can shake a big, pie-shaking stick at.
For others it's about family, offering thanks for the many blessings we've received during the year, and maybe having a few too many dry reislings before telling your uncle that he could probably better understand the Occupy Movement if he rolled down the windows of his Lexus and took his first deep, un-airconditioned breath of inequality. Oops!
Most of the world doesn't give a shit about Thanksgiving, though, and that's fine with me. Babies continue to be birthed, waves continue to roll toward shorelines, and my 1998 Toyota Siena minivan continues to guzzle coolant like someone I know guzzled dry reisling before having a few fateful words with their newly-estranged uncle. Oops!
And surfboards! Surfboards are dreamed-up, fantasized about, laden with impossible hopes and dreams, belabored, ordered, anticipated, then finally received in a ritual as complex as the holiday itself. The following is a journey of two fresh boards--one for Mike and one for Kelsey--delivered, surfed, and toasted during our recent Thanksgiving pilgrimage to SanO.
1. The reveal: 7'6" quad egg and 9'4" log.
2. The First Wax. Child labor makes the process faster, though much more likely to get wax in places where wax doesn't go, Like on the bottom. Or on fins. Or in finboxes. Tough call.
3. The Kicking-of-the-Tires: gonna be a good noserider! My 2yr old channeling George Greenough's hair.
4. The Hero Shot.
5. The Locating-of-the-Sweet-Spot.
6. The Staying-Out-Until-Near-Dark-and-Trading-Boards-and-Experiencing-General-Euphoria.
The seasonal spirit more than made up for the I5 traffic, though I have to admit the first spirit I hit after twelve hours of driving was a wee bit of the Talisker 10yr--another reason to give thanks.
As Artie from the Larry Sanders said of Talisker 10, "one day you will die and go to heaven. When you enter the pearly gates and meet God for the first time you will say 'hello' and he will say 'hello' back. When he does, this is what you will smell on his breath."
In my dreams God also has a post-sess saltwater nasal drip going, some serious surf hair, and a smile that says my secret spot is snapping, and I'm in a giving mood. That's an idea of heaven I could really get behind.
Thanks for reading, and hope you had a great holiday.

8 comments:

pranaglider said...

Great piece! The Sanders bit had the morning tea spurting out my nose. I may have to look into the Talisker.

HeadHighGlassy said...

Morning tea at 10am? I'll give you a pass this morning, as it's pretty friggin cold out.
Know what will warm you up? Talisker 10. Not for everyday (on my budget at least), but you'll know when you need it.

pranaglider said...

The real question is how smooth is it coming out the nose after reading another amusing quip on HH&G? ;)

Anonymous said...

How long before the girls are in the water sharing a session with you? Looks like maybe they'll follow in Dad's footsteps too, as the new up and coming groms?

Anonymous said...

The last time that I got in one of those "Post San O buzz-kill" traffic jams on my way home north o the gate, after a holiday in the south land I was able to get my OC born and bred wife to take the helm of the minivan while I hid out in the back seat, controlled the kid's dvd selections and took nips of $10 a bottle drug store bourbon from a flask. That cheap stuff never tasted so damned good! Heaven while in hell, so to speak!

HeadHighGlassy said...

Genius! Now I just have to learn to trust my wife's driving...maybe the drug store bourbon would help take that edge off...

Kirk said...

You know, next time you head south fire me an email- it'd be great to say Hello if possible, especially if you have Talisker. Over the holiday I did the Balvenie (oak & sherry cask aged, not bad for a Speyside) and a little Serbian brandy- a surf was out of the question so why not?

HeadHighGlassy said...

Totally meant to, Kirk. Things just got a little nutty up here before the departure and I spaced it. Next time, for sure, especially if you're pouring libations.
Didn't bring the Talisker--I know my crew, and it would have fallen into the wrong hands and inspired all kinds of shenanigans (some involving pantslessness). I'll save some of that for your next trip north...